I am 34 years old and have suffered through 2.5 years of infertility including 2 angel babies. My dream has always been to be a mom, and I never imagined that dream would be so difficult to attain. I am married to a wonderful man who is the best husband and daddy anyone could hope for. Our dreams came true when we adopted our son, Jackson, in August of 2010. Our lives became even more blessed and full when our daughter, Addison, was born in February 2011. Please join us on our journey - where surprises are just part of the fun!
...is exhausting!!! Now, before you all yell and scream at me, "You wanted this!!" let me tell you that I know! And I still do, more than anything! God help the person who tries to pry Jackson from my arms! It doesn't change the fact that I am tired. Not the yawning, gosh it'll be nice to get a little sleep, caffeine helps kind of tired. It's the kind of body aching, eyes burning, head throbbing kind of exhaustion. I knew this would happen to me. I have always liked and truly needed my sleep. So, I expected that constant mid-night feedings would take it's toll. What I didn't expect, because I had no idea, was how the all-day care of him would suck all my energy, too. It seems I no sooner get done changing and feeding him and he wants (needs) to be held, rocked, patted, etc, and then needs to be changed and fed again. I'm lucky if I get a meal in here or there:). He has decided that he can't fall asleep, nor stay asleep long if he is not being held. So, yes, I am tired (and my house is a mess, and my thank you notes aren't done, and my errands aren't done, and...you get the picture). I know we should "break" him of this habit of being held all the time (or at least I've had a hundred people tell me that), but when your newborn is crying and needing you and can't regulate his own body, how do you let him lie there without going to help him? I'll begin working on that when he's older, when he has the skills he needs to get through it. For now, I'm going to allow him to have a safe, protected and, yes, coddled "fourth trimester." He deserves it. I'll get my sleep when he's 20...maybe:). I'm told by other mommies that my body will adjust and I'll get used to it...I'm still waiting for that particular miracle! Until then, let me leave you with some pictures of my favorite little miracle, who happens to be strapped to me with the Moby Wrap as we speak...
After his first bath, which he actually didn't hate:)
Such a cute outfit...and do you see how long he is getting?!
He's so sweet when he is sleeping...while being held by daddy of course:).