So, this week I am completing the Dear Birthparent letter (ugggghh), the photo collage and the information for birthparents form. I set it up with the social worker to hand it all to her on Saturday when we are in Tucson, at which point we will officially be in THE BOOK! For this week, she said if a situation pops up, she'll call us. So, we are technically ready to be shown! I am struggling with the Dear Birthparent letter because it is fully written now, but we only have a page, and I feel like there is so much more to be said. But, I am coming to peace with the fact that it doesn't have to be perfect. I am also struggling with the photo collage. It looks nice on the computer, but when I had Staples print it on glossy paper, it looked too dark. Oh, and I made 11 copies which cost me $13. I figured it was the best I was going to get. But, when I got home, I just couldn't deal with it. I'm only a little bit of a perfectionist;). And, remember, this is the ONLY thing we can control in this process...so I want it to be good. Another adoptive mommy who was in my classes told me about another place in town who might be able to lighten it up for me. So, instead of getting something done today, I created another task to be done this week.
I have to be honest...I am exhausted! I have been spending every free minute doing adoption -related stuff. I guess it is good practice for when we have the little one home. What I learned, though, is that I cannot work full time and be a good mommy. I am SO drained after work, and trying to balance all this adoption stuff with my job is just too much. When I'm at work, I'm distracted with all the other things I need to be doing for the homestudy or the nursery and when I'm finally home, I'm so exhausted and don't have the energy to give the personal stuff my full attention. I admire people who can do it all and stay energetic and on top of things. I guess I'm not one of those people.
So, there you go. Our homestudy is done. I think it took about 5 weeks...can't beat that! Now, we wait, and hope and pray for our miracle. Please keep us in your prayers - that we have the strength and patience to endure this uncertain wait with grace.